Giggles

Giggles
Originally uploaded by karijean

Being a mom is SO much better than being pregnant.

Heh. I just said "being a mom." I'm a mom.

Our days aren't very exciting, and when I step outside myself I worry a little about that. I don't want to be someone who only talks about her baby, but really, that's my day.

But like I said, it's only when I step outside myself. Most days? I'm delighted that my mornings usually consist of napping with a tinylong baby sleeping on my chest. As a friend said--it won't last forever, just enjoy it while it's happening. And I do. My flickr account has become filled with pictures of babies. Mostly of baby. I mean, wouldn't yours? Look at him! Plus, our afternoons are occasionally slow and so I start taking pictures. I love it.

Mostly. I mean, it's not like this kid poops unicorns and butterflies. Reality check. There's the whining and some days I do want to do things and scheduling around an infant is challenging at best, and frustrating and crazy-making at worst.

Before a child, leaving for, say, a party was: grab keys, go. The only things you had to check were: cell phone? check. Underwear not showing? check. Sometimes you'd leave off the 2nd one.

Now it's: Cell phone? check. Charged? check. Diaper bag? check. Diaper bag stocked with diapers, wipes, and change of clothes in case of poop explosion? check. Carrier and/or stroller? check. Was he fed and/or do we have plans for when he needs to eat?

Etc.

But we do it. I'm proud of what we do, where we go. We've been to visit my grandmother about four times since she's gotten here. Go to Target. That's a full afternoon plan. Whoo-hoo! And I've spent a lot of afternoons at my parents' new house. I'm proud we get out of the house. I don't aim big, but I hit what I aim at.

The summer is half over, and this has been the slowest, most mildly paced summer I've ever had, and yet I've gotten to the halfway point faster than I ever thought possible. I'm doing my best not to think about August and the return to responsibility.

That has to be the best part of this all--I am only responsible for our little world right now, the three of us. It's a vacation--a mental one. (Given our finances--that's the only kind of vacation we'll be able to afford. For a very long time. Hello, mental beaches! Hey, virtual ski slopes!) In five weeks, we get to learn a new balancing act, which should be interesting.

Until then--I may try to start instituting walks into my day. I have big plans. Huge. And as long as I stay in th emoment--I'm feeling great about it.